The Windows

window

The windows were big – as big as us. We would stand and the windows would cover our full length. The windows were green – a sort of strange bottle green – faded here and there-probably due to the direct rays of the sun falling on them. Those were our windows – our windows to the world outside. And then there were those iron railings in the windows. They were once green perhaps but by the time they became ‘our’ windows they were partly rusted, dark iron railings. They would leave behind marks of brown and a strange rusty smell if we had been clinging on too long but those – the wooden frames, windows, railings were a part of our childhood.

Being naughty that he was, my brother would often use the window to the extreme right on our first floor, as his toilet of convenience.  If prodded to get up too early, he would simply crawl onto the window and pee to his heart’s content – right through the window railings!

On the days when we were not allowed to go out, the windows would become our mini-bus. Hanging from the railings, one feet inserted, we would become bus conductor. Changing our voice to a hoarse one, we would scream “Rokkey, rokkey…bhai…passenger, passenger”. Those days collecting bus tickets from elders was a favourite past time. And these would be the times when we would make use of the tickets. Each of us would want to become the conductor with no one willing to be the passenger. The end result would be two conductors hanging from the same window screaming, “rokkey, rokkey”.

Those were the days when television shows were limited to Sunday shows and one hour every evening. So, all our happiness would revolve around inane, lifeless things surrounding us.

Having been a permanent patient of tonsillitis, a little bit of rain would mean house-arrest for me. From the other side of the windows I would watch the sky gathering tufts of dark clouds and then the fall of the rain – in drops first and then in furious slants! Looking left and right, having noticed no one around, I would slip out my hands through the window, trying to entrap the water droplets within my palm. Emboldened by the venture I would go on to slip out my foot too. But I was a bad prankster and the wet edges of my frock sleeves would often give my prank away! My mother would surely come to know of it.

There was this window in my study room that would not open outside but to another room. The window was shut permanently and became my black-board. Using the bottle green back-ground and left –over chalks I would play ‘Miss Miss’ – pretending to be the science teacher of my class. The uneven surface was often difficult to draw upon but I would somehow manage to draw the diagrams. I even had a torn piece of cloth tucked within the railings as the duster for my ‘blackboard’.

I had my single cot adjacent to the window. During hot summer afternoons, I would spend hours simply staring at the closed window. There were numerous near-obscure  crevices all through the wooden parts. A long file of ants would steadily and patiently march along to reach and disappear into one of the crevices. Some of the ants from yet another groups would criss-cross ways – and as two ants from opposite groups would meet face to face they would pause for a while and change their path. I would conjure up imaginary conversation between the opposite factions – sometimes amicable, at times disputing….There were pairs of pigeons who used to reside in the little room-ventilators – ‘akum-akum; akum-akum’ they used to coo along – providing the perfect background score. Training my ears, I would wait for familiar sounds to float in through the window– ‘Achaar, achhar’….the heavenly sound of the hawker selling pickles!

The windows were our ‘conspiracy centers’. During many a summer afternoon, my cousins and I, used to organise ‘window-to window’ talks. Each of us would stand at our respective window and chat in low voices or fix timings for our evening games or even develop plans for the next prank.

The railed windows used to let in sliced pieces of golden sunlight – flooding the red-oxide floors with unending warmth. During winter, mother used to lay out a mat at exactly the spot where there was adequate sunlight. Then she used to throw quilts, blankets and woollens on top of the mat –making them crisp and warm and smelling of sunlight!

Sitting besides the window on a hot summer night was especially magical. The jasmine creepers peeping through the open window would let out whiffs of fragrance from the tiny white blooms. The fragrance would be maddening…..though somehow depressing too. Coupled with the diffused moonlight, the little white flowers would remind of some unknown sadness. The night before my marriage, I stood for long hour in front of the window- savouring the last moments of my childhood freedom.  The rusty smell of the windows made me cry.

As we grew up, life became different – a bit more convenient, bit more adjusting to the new life systems.  Repairing the huge windows and rusted railings became expensive and so were replaced with sliding glass-windows. The windows close with a ‘click’ and make the room a near sound-proof one. But even if the faint sounds of the street-hawker does not penetrate, the rich smell of the blooming jasmine still makes it’s way in. The other day I saw my niece reaching out tiny fingers through the grilled window to pluck a few jasmine flowers for her dolly. Having managed to pluck in a handful, she held out her clasped palm. “Aunty, just smell it…soooooo beautiful”, she smiled, I smiled. In her, around her, a small part of my childhood perhaps still exists somewhere. Every childhood, I guess, has a soul .We grow up, circumstances change but that soul remains embedded within the concretes of yesterday!

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16 thoughts on “The Windows

  1. Every time I read your memoir, I relive them 🙂 as some part of your memories are exactly same as mine 🙂 The part where doors and windows serve as blackboard for playing teacher-teacher 😀 The part where you sit by window sill on full moon nights 🙂 But I the window which is engraved in my memory is the one at my granny’s place.

    I have spent my summer afternoons watching people from there. I have seen the heavy pour of rain from this place. You have once again opened a old chapter of my memory 🙂 Thank you so much for taking me down this memory lane ❤

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  2. This article like many of yours exudes a kind of nostalgia that covers us like warm blankets. I too spent my childhood days using window as one of the ways to get in touch with the outside world– running from one window to another (remember Charulata? ) for ghugniwalas, alookabliwalas, in case I lost them to others.

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    • True Didi ! Those days when we had no other distraction, the windows were our source of unending excitement! And the fun in catching a glimpse of a ghugniwala through the window and running down the stairs in mad frenzy……I miss those days, Didi! Thank you for these little add-ons that you provide through your comments…it is as if I am chatting with you over a cup of tea! 🙂

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  3. You didn’t know how much you have made me nostalgic! I wonder how could our memories of “windows” be so similar! We had such rusty grilled windows, the colour was blu..faded blue. I used to play bus conductor climbing those grills….whiff of jasmine coming through the window during summer days… I just relived my childhood through your post. Thank you!

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